AMD rebrand shock

Athlon name makes way for racy new trademarks for the metrosexual generation, reports Penelope Nexgen

Shock waves were rippling across the computing world today as AMD announced a huge swathe of rebranding. The Athlon name we have come to know and love since the late 1990s will be no more. First to go will be the Athlon 64, although the Athlon X range will continue for a limited time as the Athlon XR3i. The brand is designed to be ‘affordable but a bit sporty – something even a hairdresser could own.’

However, the new native quad-core processor will be launched as the Femidom. The name is intended to continue the prophylactic theme begun with the Duron, and will be based on the Special K core previously codenamed Benidorm, as the K9 was considered to be barking up the wrong tree. At the same time, AMD itself will become PMT. Many in the industry had accused AMD of being ‘menopausal’, and the name change is designed to show that the company is still young and sexy. The ATi brand will simultaneously become L’ATi (pronounced latey-eye), in commemoration of the regular tardiness of new product releases, but with a romantic French image.

‘New brand names obviously make your products perform better,’ explained PMT’s temporary PR executive, Fenella Trojan. ‘Intel saw a huge speed increase when it moved from Pentium to Core, and we expect something similar by switching from Athlon to the new marque.’

The first Femidom will hit the market when PMT feels the Athlon brand has lost all the nuances of performance it had built up over the last decade. So industry pundits predict the launch is imminent.